It seems the past month, my life has been touched by many reminders of how precious and fragile our time on earth is.
Today an online friend Sharyn is being buried. I met her through the national SHARE website. SHARE is a group to those who have been through a pregnancy or infant loss. I found it pretty quickly after losing Caleb and spent many nights in the chat rooms with other moms who had been through it and many hours on the message boards - she was always there for me and for so many others. A virtual hug might seem kind of stupid, but those from Sharyn and all the other SHARE moms really helped me though my grief. Sharyn lost 7 babies, she was so supportive and welcoming and always had many smiley faces in her posts. Despite the sad story of her journey to be a mom, she was always upbeat. She was only 42 and died of cancer - she put up a brave and valiant fight. She leaves behind a husband and an almost 3 year old, her beautiful daughter Gabby. I know Sharyn is up in heaven dancing with her children she had very little time with or never knew on earth outside of her womb. She was a friend to MANY and will be missed.
A couple weeks ago, I recognized a picture in the obituary section of the paper. A 35 year old man, a father of 2 died of complications after surgery to remove a cancerous tumor from his bile duct. I did not know Ryan personally, his family went to the same church I did growing up and the same grade school. His oldest brother was a year younger than me. Its strange how I recognized him though...I mean, the last time I saw him, he was a child. After reading his story, I have not been able to stop thinking about him and his family. What an amazing man, his family should be so proud of him. I hope as a mom, I can raise such a special child....my heart goes out to his family.
A few weeks ago, I was forwarded the news a man I knew from my single days back at Christ the King had died from brain cancer. Ernie was only45 and leaves behind a wife and 3 children. I briefly dated him, extremely nice and fun guy... just not "the one" for me.
So many stories of families losing a parent, a spouse, a child. I know people die everyday, I mean the only certainty of life is that we will all die. I am no stranger to loss so maybe I feel things and it stirs up emotions I think are gone, I am over or are just buried. Just seems so odd to me that this past month I have been touched the the passing of people my age and generation.
I hope I can learn from this to just live each life to the fullest and to be grateful to many blessings I have received. I want to not be anxious about the future and to just live in the moment - I have issues with anxiety sometimes. You never know what is going to happen and its wasted energy worrying about "what ifs". In the end if we lived a good life, we are rewarded. I truly hope to be reunited with my loved ones and to live an eternal life of peace and joy.
Please pray for those who have passed, especially Sharyn, Ryan and Ernie. I firmly believe those who have passed need our prayers.
Eternal rest grant unto them oh Lord, and may perpetual light shine upon them.
2 weeks ago